Low investment in a relationship or dating comes in a lot of sugar coated words or sentences and one of the most famous sentence is “OH, sorry i cant seem to make time because i am busy”, now, I do agree that a person can be really busy but if that is used as an excuse all the time by your partner when he or she does not make an effort to make time for you then I would say it is low investment. Low investment in a relationship is the beginning of a lot of problems and usually when this happens, the other person in the relationship starts putting in more effort to make up for their partner’s low investment. I have been there and done that in my earlier relationship with a man who would always make up excuses about being busy with his family, one day it was his sister coming over to visit the family and the next it was his nephew who had come over and i totally understood until I let it go on for too long. What later hit me was that this man who cleared all his schedule to meet me was now making excuses for not being able to text me on the phone for two days straight with no updates while he went out and hung out with his friends. In this time span, i would always try my best to communicate but what i had not realized was that i needed to invest as much as he was investing. Dating or a committed relationship is all about going half and half which would maintain a balance regardless of the circumstances. As i had been seeing this man for about 4 months, I decided to let him know that if he wanted to be with me, he needed to fulfill my basic needs which was apparently too much for this guy and I just did not think going back and forth was also worth it anymore, that became too much of an investment too. So i went ahead and just put him in the not so important category and did what I had to do, which was investing in people who were investing in me, focusing on my hobbies and school.
You do not start investing in them as much as they invest in you out of spite or with the want to have them come back to you but with the realization that your time is important and valuable and anyone who does not make the same investment does not deserve anything extra. Now, when people make low investment its for a lot of reasons, maybe they are not that into you, maybe they are getting cold feet , Maybe just maybe they are contemplating about their feelings for you and someone else or just simply because they choose to prioritize other things above you. When this guy came around again, he promised to change but later gave me the same excuse which was “I am just that person and i cant change” and wanted to end things with me, that is when the famous quote by Maya Angelou flashed before my eyes which says “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” and that is what I did, I believed it and walked away gracefully because I did not want to commit or be exclusive with a man who wasn’t investing from the very beginning and was clearly telling me that he was never going to change because I had already given him a chance. I did not want to change him or fix him or beg him to stay, I just moved on and wished him the best because what he wasn’t willing to do, other men were . When you start valuing your time, you will start investing in more important things. when someone takes one step, do not take 10 more and make people too comfortable about your presence and time. Go do your thing, and if your partner comes around with higher investment then you can go ahead and do the same.
If they still don’t do it then why would you want to talk or be with someone who does not enjoy quality time with you?.